Feelings.. Why Do You Need Them?
music: Train - When I Look To The SkyFuck it. Why can't someone just be more understanding towards me. It's that way in school and outside, but I don't care because we don't have a close relationship. Let bygones be bygones.. that's how you live your life outside. Otherwise, you'll be offended very easily because people do hurt you. That's a daily occurance I cannot escape. However, when it comes to your parents not being understanding, that totally breaks my heart and I swell with emotion for a second. How could they pass judgement so quickly about me without first understanding the situation that I was in? Does everything has to be my fault? Why must me always be the one to be blamed first while the outsiders are always sparred? Fuck.
And I'm reacting really stupidly around this girl I have a crush on. Though I'm not showing it but I get jealous easily when she treats someone with such friendly manner. With me it's just hi and bye. Lately I find myself stealing glances of her, unconsciously. I wish I could just shut down my emotions and feelings. I don't want to feel anything anymore. I don't know how to act or what to do with my feelings. The funny thing is that... I don't even have anything in common with her. I hate all those pop singers she admires. Just what kind of shit is my feeling messing with me. Fuck. And she has a boyfriend, for god's sake. I'm so disgusted with myself.
